Friday, January 30, 2009

Time for Life

To the Creator of the Universe, the Maker of my Soul, My Protector, My Guide, and My Friend:

Please grant me time here on this Earth. I need to know that I have time. Your creation and your gift of life are amazing. I love them, and I want to experience them all. I am so thankful to be here, right here, in this moment, but my greatest fear is that my time here will end before I can fully experience all the gifts You have to offer. If it so, please tell me…

That I do not have to do everything on my bucket list this year.

That I do not have to become who I eventually want to be right this minute.

That I have time to fulfill my promises to my children.

That I have time to settle, for the time being, for a career that is not really what I had planned on, because it provides the schedule and income my family needs.

That I have time to learn about all those subjects I am curious about.

That I have time to read all those books.

That I have time to become a better mountain biker, someday.

That I have time to hike the 2,000 mile Appalachian Trail all at one time, when the time is right.

That I have time to do it in shorter sections before I do the whole thing.

That I have time to go to law school.

That I have time to change my mind if I don’t want to be an attorney.

That I have time to write a book, become a journalist, or take whatever door opens for me that I like.

That I have time to try and fail, and time to try again.

That I have time to build my own legacy.

That I have time to learn and experience who You really are; time to learn and time to understand what my purpose truly is here in your world.

That I have time to fulfill that purpose.

I want it all...I admit it, I want all You have to offer.

I have been living with a panic-stricken sense of urgency that I have to be everything I need to be and do everything I want to do today.

Your universe is vast and your gifts are boundless. I can’t do it all in one day…or one year. Please, give me time.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Tales From the Dark Side

Has it been a week since I last posted?! Geez...that's not like me at all (sarcasm, of course). I have been sporadic, at best, since I last told you what a great week was I having. My partner in crime - my little sis - started keeping me out too late and such, and all the sudden I couldn't get out of bed to workout. I missed an easy run on Thursday morning. No big deal, right? Then I missed a 16 miler on Friday morning. Getting serious, but hey, you can always do it Saturday morning before the fam wakes up. Then I missed it Saturday morning, and it was all over but the crying.

Saturday night was the Mach Tenn running club's winter par-tay, and I wasn't stupid enough to think I would get up and run on Sunday afterwards. I mean, you still have to maintain a certain amount of realism - even when you like to go running in 4 degree weather and sh%#. Anyways, I took Bo to baseball practice on Friday night, and then we made our normal trip to Books-A-Million (we love a book store), and I decided I would run into a few stores to see if I could find a hot looking top for the party with a hot looking sale price, since we are nearing the end of winter and all (I love a good deal, too). Well, not only did I find a hot looking top, but I found four hot looking tops! And since they were $50 tops marked down to $9.99, well of course I just bought them all. FYI - it was at Express...better go get'em while they last, girls.

Saturday night came and I laid all 4 hot looking tops out on the bed...they were all delightfully new and crisp, tags still intact. I have a thing about a new piece of just makes me feel prettier when it's new. It was not an easy choice, so I did my hair and makeup first, came back to deliberate, and finally decided on the black tank with jewels on the front. Tentively, because you might get it on and it just not be the right one for the moment, ya know? After wearing it around the house for a while, though, I decided it was right and proceeded to put on my jacket and finish the final touches(or so I thought) before heading out. I met Holly and Rosalind at the rec center, and we crashed the party. We immediately got into those cool conversations about the next marathon and nutrition during an ironman and qualifying for Boston. I had a glass of wine, and started feeling a bit warm in the crowd with my wool coat. Roger - the gracious host - walked up and asked to take my coat. Feeling confident with my brand new hot looking shirt on-that nobody would know only cost me $9.99 instead of $49.99 - I ever so gracefully pulled one arm out, swung my brown hair around and pulled the other arm out...picked up my wine glass, and turned to walk back over to the IM nutrition conversation...

...when I feel people looking at me...

Subliminal thoughts arise: Oh my! Do I really look that good? There's no need to stare, really!

Then Kristie Sliger starts walking towards me. She gets really close and says, "Hey Lana! I like your shirt..."

...and I'm thinking "Oh! It's my new hot looking top! That's what the fuss is about!"

And she proceeds..."but honey, you've left the tag hanging out back here."

The tag. Big ol' tag hanging way out. Brightly shining with $49.99 marked out and $9.99 written in. Complete with the red dot and all. You know about the red dot sales, right?

Whew. Deep. Breath.

All the sudden I needed an air conditioner during the middle of the coldest winter in years. I could feel sweat beading up on my forehead within seconds. She yanked the tag off for me, but I was so torn up after that I couldn't even remember what I drank on the bike during IMFL. I was rendered totally useless in all those cool conversations.

One of my reasons for doing away with the blonde hair was because I didn't like that stigma about blondes. You know the one I'm talking about. So much for that.

All that aside, though, the party was a total blast. I eventually consumed enough wine that I was able to converse again, and Holly once again got me home too late.

No workout on Sunday or Monday, but I finally made it to spin class on Tuesday night. It was killer as usual. I ran 3 on the treadmill Wednesday morning, and then did toning class. Worked, and then went to masters swim after work. Nothing today, but I've got 14 miles on tap for tomorrow morning. Still contemplating what I'm banking it for, though. Who knows, it never hurts to have high mileage in the bank for whatever you might decide to do on the spur of the moment, right?!!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Laughin', Lovin', Livin'

Well, it's almost the weekend again. I've had a decent week of workouts. Sunday I went 2o miles and got excited about running again. Monday I recovered. Tuesday I ran 2 recovery miles on the treadmill and then did weights - mostly legs, and some back and chest. After work I did Don's spin class. Yes, I was one of the fortunate few who got into the ever popular class. It was a great workout, and Don plays "Never Enough" by Five Finger Death Punch. I love that's a little bit harder than what I normally listen to, but I love it:
I'd rather hate you for everything you are
Than ever love you for something you are not
I'd rather you hate me for everything I am
Than have you love me for something that I can't

Wednesday morning Tim and I ran 5 miles in 18 degrees, and then I did Cindy's toning class. After work, we had swim class. I am really loving this swim class and the instructor. She is great. She really knows her stuff, and she has a great personality. Some of us even went out for dinner afterward and had some great laughs and conversation. Facebook being the hot topic, of course! I was in a bad mood that afternoon, but the swim class and the wine cured my blues. They also affected my ability to get up and run this morning! I don't believe I'll be getting a workout in today, but I am meeting up with the group in the morning for 16 - 18 miles. They are all trying to talk me into doing the Birmingham Mercedes Marathon on Feb 15. If I get through tomorrow's run okay, I might seriously consider it. I won't be running for a PR or anything...I'll just be going because it'll be a close and cheap way to run another marathon. And also because I am famous for saying "...if you can run 20, you can run 26.2," and I sorta ran 20 the other day so...

Back to swim class, though, I am so proud of all my peeps. We have probably 20 people in there and they are doing great!! I think the class is a great thing for Manchester.

On the home front, the kids have been out of school for several days now because of cold weather and snow. Actually, Bo wasn't out, but Briar was. Briar is full swing into middle school baseball conditioning, and Bo is practicing with his travel baseball team and swimming with the swim team.

I have had to put the Seaside Half Mary plans on hold for a while due to the budget and to the hectic baseball schedule it fall into. I'm still working on it, but it's not looking good. March 1st is sooner than you think.

May 9th is a longer way out, though, and the Gulf Coast talk is already getting started. Tim is in. I have to decide what I am going to do about my bike, though. I haven't sold it, doing the whole thing is still up in the air.

Saturday night is the Mach Tenn Running Club's winter blues party. Should be lots of fun...I'm looking forward to it.

I have so much to say lately...I just don't know if this is the right place to say it. I have tried to keep this mostly a triathlon/marathon training blog, but multisport is secondary right now. I have struggled with "my place in this world" for several years now, and while I by no means have it figured out now, I do feel like I am finally taking some steps of forward progress. Vague, I know, but you probably don't want me to start spilling the tangled web of dreams, missed opportunities, and expectations that is woven in the mind of this 32 year old "ordinary girl." I'll gather my thoughts, and when I have my head wrapped around them a little more, I'll share.

Have a good weekend, in spite of the cold weather. I used to hate cold weather, but now it's just cold weather. Nothing to gripe about, really, just something to deal with as we make our way toward summer. Kind of like this bad doesn't do any good to gripe about it...just something we'll have to weather until it's all stimulated up again.

The verdict is still out on the brown hair. I just don't know. So far, I still think blonds have more fun, but the case study is nowhere near complete, yet. Here's another brown hair pic:
Peace and love. Over and out...

Monday, January 19, 2009

Going Long

"Progress always involves risk – you can't steal second with your foot on first." -Frederick Wilcox

I actually ran 20 miles Sunday. Previous long run was 10 since IMFL and a 2 month period of gluttony. Somehow, my running buddies pulled me through Manchester for twenty.freakin.miles. Damn, it feels good to say I ran 20 miles again. I'm ready to stop being lazy for reals. I had forgotten how good a twenty miler can make you feel (after the protein shake, the shower, and dinner).

Congrats to my good friend Greyhound who PR'd the Houston Marathon, and to Jessica and Rosalind who toughed out the RNRAZ marathon!!


Thank you, Dr. King, for standing up for what you believe in, and for ultimately giving your life so that so many could live the dream you spoke of. May we never forget your life, your words, and your dreams...

"I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed. Let us not wallow in the valley of despair.

I say to you today, my friends, that in spite of the difficulties and frustrations of the moment, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at a table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of injustice and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day the state of Alabama, whose governor's lips are presently dripping with the words of interposition and nullification, will be transformed into a situation where little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls and walk together as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today."

- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. "I Have a Dream" Delivered on the steps at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C. on August 28, 1963.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Friday, January 16, 2009

Cold Weather Running

If you are one of my cold-blooded, hardcore friends up North, please disregard this post as pansy-ass, unmerited boasting. on. Yesterday I received an email from the safety department where I work, warning us of the possibility of temperatures between 0 and 5 degrees Friday morning, and advising us to stay indoors if possible. Ordinarily, I don't care much for cold weather. I prefer hot weather...the hotter the better. But when I get an email such as this...when I know that Tac, Trimama, TriguyJT, and many others have been dealing with this for weeks now...not to mention the "-28 degrees" Tac and Trimama have can book it - I'm going outside. Running.

I sent an email and a text asking who was in with me...and I got one taker - Tim. But one was enough, and we met at the rec at 4:30 this morning, in 4 degrees and covered 4 miles at a 7:52 pace. I didn't wear my Garmin (and i haven't in quite a while), I just tried to keep up with Tim. I didn't realize we were running sub 8's until he informed me after 3 miles that we had "one mile left...a stretch of flat, a good downhill, and a slight uphill" and that we were going to break the 8 min pace. I reluctantly said, "Okay, I'll try" and dug down a little deeper. I did have to treat myself like Bob treated Joelle at one point...but easily enough we cruised back into the parking lot with a 7:52 pace.

That's probably a "running in low temps" PR for me, along with a 4 mile training run PR...I think. Good things happen when you don't conform to the norm.

Goodluck to Greyhound at the Houston Marathon and goodluck to Rosalind at the RNRAZ Marathon!!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Random Rambling

Sometimes there is just so much to say, that I don't really know what to say. I have a lot of random thoughts running through my head at any given time... but lately they've been working overtime. So, without further's a sample of random ramblings...

A new year is a good thing.

2008 rocked for Lana The Triathlete. But Lana is more than a triathlete.

Life is the coolest thing in the whole world. In good times or hard's so freakin' hard and exciting all at the same time.

Freedom might be cooler. Freedom to choose, freedom to think, freedom to change. Thank God for freedom.

I love being an adult. You hear people say, "Oh, to be a kid again." Not me. And I had a wonderful childhood...but I'll take the responsibility + freedom any day over being under someone's control.

We're going to get through this financial crisis, someday. There's another day a comin'.

You have no idea what all I really am.

I ran and then did spin class Thursday night. Then I ran 10 miles on Friday @8:28/mile. I ran 6 miles yesterday morning in 25 degrees, and it felt wonderful. The best I've felt on foot since October. And I'm not training for a damn thing, really.

“We know what we are, but know not what we may be.”
-William Shakespeare

Hot weather and sweat is my favorite, but there is something so pure and refreshing about running under the moonlight during the middle of winter. You can see your breath and you can see the frost glistening on the grass and the trees. Now we just need that one good snow.

...and I have 'miles to go before I sleep...'

I didn't have any New Year's Resolutions, but I am heading in a different direction. Somehow, someway. It's time to get below the surface.

Since the Ironman is over, I feel like I have quit my job, although I still work the same amount of hours as always. It feels the same way it did when I graduated from college, and the same way it did when I really did quit my job to stay at home with my kids. There's all this time. The laundry is now no problem to keep caught up. The dishes never sit in the sink. The dust doesn't build up and the floors are nice and shiny. How come I couldn't keep the laundry caught up and the house clean before I started training for IM?

Peace and new mantra.

I did the vegan thing for 4 weeks. I liked it, and I felt great, but it's a hard thing to do living in Manchester, TN with 2 growing boys and carnivorous husband. Logistics and money, rather than willpower, made my decision to just be "vegetarian" for December. I liked that, too, but on January 1st I decided to just eat healthy - meat or no meat. So, going forward, I eat vegetarian if I've got a feasible choice, but I choose to eat meat before I choose to go hungry. Hungry Lana is not a good thing, because she will eventually find food and devour it. ;)

I like to read books, but they make me fall asleep no matter how good they are or how bad I want to stay awake. It takes me a long time to finish a book because I read a few pages, fall asleep, then try again the next day. I do the same thing when watching a movie. What's up with that?

I wanted to see Frost/Nixon AND Doubt over the holidays on the big screen, but neither were showing at a theater less than a 75 minute drive from here. That really pissed me off.

I'm getting rid of my stupid Verizon phone and getting an iPhone with AT&T. Very soon.

I have been MIA from the blog scene, and I apologize. I'll be catching up with all you guys soon. I hope I haven't missed anything major.

I am selling my bike. It's got a brand new frame since IMFL, never ridden. 2008 Red Orbea Ora, small, full carbon fiber, Dura-Ace components, Mavic Cosmic Elite Wheels. If you're interested, let me know. I can send new pics or you can find many pics on this blog as well(old frame, but just like it). I'm not sure what kind of bike I'm getting upon the sale of this one...maybe a road bike, I don't know. I won't be bike-less for long, though.

I also have an aero helmet for sale. I wore it one time, at the Chattanooga Waterfront Triathlon. It's a Louis Garneau TT Rocket helmet, size Medium. It is too big for my head. I shouldn't have bought it in the first place, since the bike shop didn't have a small. Let me know if you're interested.

And while I'm on a role selling stuff, my house is for sale, too. If you are local and need a new pad that's a little small, but has been taken care of well, new paint, new hardwood floors, etc., give me a call.

Need anything else? I might have it and will probably sell it or give it to you. ;)

And finally...did you ever think you would see me without blond hair???

"'If it ain't broke, don't fix it' is the slogan of the complacent, the arrogant or the scared. It's an excuse for inaction, a call to non-arms." -Colin Powell