Ugh. Up all night coughing. Head's all stopped up. I'm tired. I don't feel well, and I can't deny it or talk myself out of it anymore.
I couldn't get up enough energy to do anything Monday. Tuesday I got up and ran 4 miles then swam1300 yds, but I hated every minute of it and felt like crap the whole time. The plan was to run 6 miles this morning, but I knew by 10 p.m. last night that I wasn't going to do it.
No mojo at all.
It's 20 degrees today and supposed to be 50 degrees tomorrow. What the hell? I want to load my bike up in my car and pack my clothes to ride at lunch, but I can't seem to convince myself that it will actually be warm enough tomorrow.
All that aside, I have too many thoughts in my head. I was up on the computer last night, not doing anything important, when I noticed that I was basically trying to pry my eyes open to stay awake. I was physically wincing from fighting to keep from falling asleep. Common sense took over from there, my head hit the pillow, and I was asleep in less than a minute. Only to be woken up 1 a.m. with a cough that kept me up the rest of the night.
Back to having too many thoughts in my head. I'm wearing myself out. I think I have an abnormal amount thoughts at any given time. I think about one thing that reminds me of another thing, that has a lot to do with that other thing. And I don't know enough about this, which reminds me that I need to do some research on that, and if I knew more about this I might know what I want to do when I grow up. I'd really like to do this, but I could also do that. Oh yeah, I do already have a real job, and I guess I am already grown up, which remind me of those others things I could investigate, but then there's this that I had always thought about doing too. Or that. And I've never done this. I could always try that. This is cool. That's interesting. I'm exhausted.
I'm prying my eyes open again. Where is the line between ambitious and unsettled?
11 years ago
5 comments:
Ohhhh Lana... please take care of yourself! Sounds to me like you need some (guilt-free) rest. Prayers for some feeling-better-ness asap!
Sounds like it's more about you being sick than not having any mojo. Take care :-)
ugh. I feel your pain. And the opposite of mojo is bad juju.
Your mojo is fine, you just need some rest, and I am the same way with the restless though process. Try to get some rest. I hope that you feel better real soon.
I hope you get a good night sleep tonight and feel better! (((HUGS)))
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